Week 2 Predictions

Before I get into this week's picks, a word about my TwittPick. ALWAYS GO WITH YOUR GUT!!!! This is what I get for listening to other people. I knew to pick Baltimore. In a rival game, unless the away team has been in beast mode for several weeks, or the home team is down right terrible, I always pick the home team. Because home field advantage is real. Something like getting yo' ass whooped in front of your kid or a group of friends. It just ain't right.

Anyway, Baltimore won, and I would have been right but for my ridiculous decision to listen to a co-worker and a friend of mine. Note to self: don't ask for their opinions anymore.

Ah well, let's see if I can do any better for this week. Here we go:

Miami v. Buffalo: Both teams are coming off of huge wins last week. But I'm really liking EJ Manuel and Buffalo's defense, so I'll go with Buffalo. To be fair, that's pure speculation.

Detroit v. Carolina: I am calling Detroit, and here's why. Cam Pretty-Boy-Oh-So-Fine Newton was apparently talking mad smack in a press conference earlier this week. He referred to Newton called Ndamukong Suh “Donkey Kong Suh” five times during his press conference.* For those of you keeping track, Suh is a dirty defensive tackle. And near as I can tell, he wears that title as a badge of honor. He gives, ZERO f***s about the fines that the NFL is willing to dole out. In recent memory, he's been tagged for unnecessary roughness, stepping on an opposing player's hand, and an infamous stomp during the Thanksgiving 2011 game against the Packers:



So basically, I hope Cam Newton has some of the best blockers ever to play the game. Otherwise it's going to be a VERY long day for Cam. And Detroit wins without any reference to the Golden Megatron combo.

Atlanta v. Cincinnati: Cincinnati.

New Orleans v. Cleveland: New Orleans. Always bet on Drew Brees.

New England v. Minnesota: New England. Yeah, Minnesota is coming off a huge win...but they're also losing AP to child abuse charges in Texas.** Meanwhile, New England got walloped by Miami last week, and Tom Brady's ego won't let him lose twice.

Arizona v. New York: Arizona could pull this off. New York seems to be mid re-building year, and they've given Eli a whole lot to learn. Plus, we all know that the Giants start show every year.

Dallas v. Tennessee: Tennessee.

Jacksonville v. Washington: Washington.

Seattle v. San Diego: Seattle.

St. Louis v. Tampa Bay: Tampa Bay. Lovie Smith is supposed to be the defense guru, and St. Louis is hurting from losing their QB (again). If you picked up TB's defense in your fantasy league, it might be a good day for you.

Kansas City v. Denver: Denver. I'm not sure bitterness and hate is going to carry KC into another season. But in any event, Peyton is at home.

New York v. Green Bay: Green Bay. The Packers just aren't losing this game at home. #nope.

Houston v. Oakland: Houston.

Chicago v. San Francisco: San Francisco. Cutler makes horrible decisions and SF has a great defense. SF also has a competent QB...so there's that.

Philadelphia v. Indianapolis: Indianapolis. Truthfully? Pure speculation. LeSean McCoy is still Shady McCoy and likely to take off running. But Andrew Luck seems to have some sort of magical ability to win at home.





*FIVE TIMES, B? Really?!!? FIVE???

**side note: What is going on in the NFL? It's only Week 2 and we've had 3 well-known players arrested, plus 2 major positive drug charges. It's going to be The Replacements playing the game pretty soon. Somebody tell Keanu Reaves and Faizon Love to suit up.